The Girls From Ames by Jeffrey Zaslow
We won't have our discussion on this book until next Monday (October 7th). However, as promised, here are some discussion questions. I will give a quick review of the book and answer a few of these questions next week. I hope you are enjoying the book!
The questions:
1. At
the end of his Introduction, author Jeffrey Zaslow repeats a question posed to
him: “Could a man ever really understand women’s friendships?” How would you
answer that question? Do you think Zaslow succeeded in his attempt to portray
and explain the Ames girls’ long-lasting bonds?
2. Also
in the Introduction, Zaslow explains the basis of the Wall Street Journal column that gave birth to this book, saying,
“The column focused on why women, more than men, have great urges to hold
tightly onto old friends.” Do you agree that women stay closer to friends than
men do? Why or why not?
3. “E-mail
has been a great gift to the Ames girls’ friendship, as it has to many other
women’s friendships in recent years,” (page 76). Talk about how technology has
changed friendships in the past decade or so. Are you in more regular or better
touch with friends because of e-mail, texting, Facebook, Twitter, or IM? Have
you formed new relationships—or, reignited dormant ones—as a result of social
networking sites?
4. “Male
friendships are often born on the athletic fields,” (page 54). What do you
believe comprises male friendships? Do they form through activities like
sports, or through something different? Do you know men who are part of a group
much like the Ames girls’? If so, how does the male group differ from the
female?
5. Which
of the Ames women do you think strayed farthest from her Midwestern upbringing,
or defied the expectations of someone raised in her hometown?
6. Cathy
tries to explain the attachment between the women as one borne out of shared
roots: “We root each other to the core of who we are, rather than what defines
us as adults—by careers or spouses or kids. There’s a young girl in each of us
who is still full of life,” (page 96). Do you think it’s common for people who
were close childhood friends to maintain that bond in adulthood?
7. “Researchers
worry about this current generation of girls. Studies suggest that the average
girl today is likely to grow up to be a lifelong dieter, to have a distorted
body image, and to be emotionally scarred by cliques,” (page 114). How has
adolescence changed from when you were young to what a teenager experiences
today? Do you share the concern that the new generation of girls faces a
tougher time than young women of bygone eras? What societal or cultural factors
might account for this shift?
8. In
Chapter 10, Marilyn’s sister explains to her: “Men who’ve confided only in a
spouse or a girlfriend can feel lost after a breakup or divorce, because they
lose their only confidant. But for a woman with close female friends, the end
of a romantic relationship is more bearable because they haven’t lost their
entire support system,” (page 146). What do you think of this supposition? Can
you think of examples in your own life that prove this statement to be true, or
that dispute it?
9.
From Rod Stewart to Hall and Oates and Grease to
Love American Style, the Ames girls’ shared experience of 70s and 80s popular
culture bolsters their connection to one another. Why is it that the music and
media of our youth is often more meaningful than what we enjoy in our later
years?
10. If
you are a woman, is The Girls From Ames a book you would recommend to a man? If
you are a man, what drew you to read this book? In what ways is Girls a story
that transcends gender?
